We all experience some despair when setbacks occur. That’s quite normal.
It is one thing to rejoice, give thanks and praise when things go right. But it’s not as easy when things go wrong. A couple of weeks ago, I shared how emotions can paralyze you and keep you from moving towards recovery.
Photo credit: Psychiatric News Alert
It’s important to take time to reflect, even grieve so that you can move on. The important thing is that taking the time to deal with your emotions is the first step. The problem is that too often people get stuck in that emotional state. Instead of merely reflecting and then moving on they get stuck there. You can read Part 1 HERE.
What most people don’t realize is that rejoicing is a very deliberate step on the road to recovery from setbacks. “What’s there to rejoice about?” you grumble. If you think about it there’s lots to be grateful for.
Saying no is among the most useful skills you can possess, especially as it pertains to pursuing and living an abundant life.
Saying no to unnecessary distractions allows you to concentrate on what is important to you. And saying no to temptation helps you accomplish your goals and stay on track. So how do you do it?
Scandal + Facebook is equal to The Wells in Jesus’ day…the place where everyone gathered to catch up on what’s happening. Since Jesus met the woman at the well, I’m following his cue. Last week, I decided to have some fun & teach life lessons during Scandal’s return. What began as a joke, turn into something special.
Here’s my first installment of Life’s Lesson’s from Scandal:
- Scandalous Lesson #1: Power is a lot like real estate. It’s all about location, location, location. The closer you are to the source, the higher your property value.
- Scandalous Lesson #2: Friends make the worst enemies. Ask Vice President Sally…Fitz would’ve saw that coming if he wasn’t slobbing Olivia down.
- Scandalous Lesson #3: Love makes you do crazy things. I’m pretty good at this
- Scandalous Lesson #4: There are two kinds of pain. The sort of pain that makes you strong. Or, the sort of pain that’s causes suffering….Olivia’s dad is wallowing in the latter.
- Scandalous Lesson #5: Here’s what Olivia’s dad was really saying: After all, we are nothing more or less than what we choose to allow others to reduce us to. Also, when the horse is dead (Pres. Fitz); dismount & move on.
- Scandalous Lesson #6: The story of Quinn teaches what happens when you’re gifted, but not wise. You can be the smartest in the room & have no clue how to apply what you know. That takes wisdom.
- Scandalous Lesson #7: Everyone needs a Huck in their lives…that crazy/genius person who’ll knock down ANYTHING & ANYONE who tries to harm you. Like Jesus, everyone needs a Peter in their circle.
- Scandalous Lesson #8: Here’s what Millie was really saying: “After they’re finished playing, they almost always come back home.”
- Scandalous Lesson #9: Olivia & Fitz please read Jeremiah 17:9; 29:11. The head has to legislate the heart because it has the ability to lead us down wrong paths. The heart blinds to what we MUST do…not what we WANT to do.
- Scandalous Lesson #10: Pastors must not insulate or isolate themselves from culture.
We must engage in culture. Jesus would do that. We must meet people where they are & help them discover their path to an abundant life. That’s why I’m watching #Scandal
Why do so many people reach success and then fail?
“One of the big reasons is, we think success is a one-way street. So we do everything that leads up to success, but then we get there. We figure we’ve made it, we sit back in our comfort zone, and we actually stop doing everything that made us successful,” according to Richard St. John.
In this TED talk, Richard St. John reminds us that success is not a one-way street, but a constant journey. He uses the story of his business’ rise and fall to illustrate a valuable lesson — when we stop trying, we fail. Check it out!
Success rarely happens without the occasional setback.
So what happens to our carefully scripted lives when things don’t go according to plan? Does that mean that we won’t ever find success? Or does it perhaps have another purpose?
Think about this for a moment. If life was a straight line that started when you’re born and ended when you die and there was no deviation from that straight line – What would life be like? Some might say it would be perfect or smooth. Others would say boring. You see life is never a straight line, no matter how much we’d like it to be.
There is nothing permanent, except change.
Now that I have your attention…
If you’re looking for a hook-up, shortcut, or another get-rich-scheme, STOP READING NOW!
Are you still with me? If so, let’s proceed. I’m not a late night infomercial salesman. But, if you’re looking for wise advice on being smart with money, then let’s explore what being rich is all about.
First, let’s clarify by what I mean by “rich,” as this is a subjective term. It’s an ever-moving target. It’s like trying to nail jello to the wall. Defining“rich” is as personal as taste preferences of food or fashion. Many times, even when you are considered by others to be rich, you don’t think of yourself that way. Why? It’s all about perspective. The problem is you don’t “feel” rich. For the sake of this post, I won’t define rich…I’m leaving that task to you. I will, however, share three tips that’ll help you “feel” rich regardless of your income.
Let me be honest with you…the desert IS NOT a fun place. It’s dry, lonely, and HOT!
Everyone goes through dry seasons. Be honest, you can recall times when you didn’t feel “spiritually high,” You attend church weekly, go to Sunday School or Bible Study, perhaps you even study your Bible, but God feels a lot more like a distant relative than somebody you’re connected to. The toughest season, and one that so many Christians seem to fight through, is the dry season–the desert months. During this season our relationship with God feels distant but lifeless. Again I repeat, everyone goes through desert seasons.
When I sense God is distant, I cringe when people tell me to “pray more” or “have more faith.” Really? That’s the best you have when you see I’m thirsty! When you go through your desert season, here are 3 key truths you can hold on to:
Let’s face it…Setbacks can be disheartening.
They can leave us feeling disempowered and discouraged. Mostly setbacks can leave us feeling as though we have no real control over our lives. Yet there are some people who are successful despite the challenges and setbacks they experience. What is their secret?
The difference is that successful people have a different perspective on setbacks. While they realize that they can’t always control the world around them, they can control how they respond to circumstances. In other words, successful people use setbacks to gain perspective when they encounter circumstances beyond their control. They see setbacks as an opportunity to REFOCUS and find an EVEN BETTER WAY to meet their goals. Setbacks don’t stop them, they simply slow them down for a short period of time.
If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not you’ll find an excuse. – Unknown
It is easy to stay motivated when everything is going well, but what happens when setbacks occur?
What happens when your “well thought out” plans don’t work out, or your world get turned upside down by events beyond your control, what do you do?
You can cry. You can crawl into a hole. You can give up. Or you can try again.
Napoleon Hill once said:
“One of the most common causes of failure is the habit of quitting when one is overtaken by temporary defeat.”
The problem with most of us is that when stuff doesn’t work out we think it’s the END instead of seeing it as just TEMPORARY DEFEAT. What we need to do is realize that the worst is never really the worst. An end isn’t always THE END. It could simply be the end to one thing and the start of another.