Urban Pastor LIVE!

Mars Hill is the kind of church men would love to attend.

Every Sunday, church pews fill up with despondent women who are forced to worship without the men in their lives. A recent survey by Ellison Research found that 31% of men never attend church even on holidays believing that church is for women, weirdos and wimps.

This sad statistic prompts parishioners and ministers alike to ask: “Where are the men?” While it’s true that several men spend their Sundays satisfying their vices for sports, beer, and sleep, men who don’t attend church usually have more substantial reasons for not attending.

However, I’d like to share five reasons why I believe Mars Hill is a church men would love to attend.

1. You won’t hear: “Be Innocent as Doves” – You’ll be encouraged to be wise as serpents: “This type of language handcuffs & robs men of power and strength.  The same word for ‘wise” that Jesus used can also be translated as shrewd and cunning. Jesus commends shrewd behavior as found in the Parable of the Shrewd Manager (Luke 16).  We largely condemn shrewdness and think it’s synonymous with criminal behavior. Other churches want nice men.  Jesus, according to his own words, wants shrewd ones.
2. You won’t be encouraged to be “Avoid Anger” – You’ll be encouraged to “Manage” It:  Scriptures reveals how Jesus was angry.  If you read the Gospels carefully, we would say that Jesus was a bad Christian man because he got angry so much.  Most men have not been shown a better way…how to properly handle this primary emotion for guys since unresolved anger can lead to depression, alcohol and drug abuse, and even impotency.
3. We don’t beg – We Take One Offering - PERIOD: God doesn’t want your money - He wants YOU! If He did, He’d take it all & not ask for your permission.  With rising unemployment and a higher cost of living the last thing any man wants to see when he goes to church is a pastor with his hand out asking for more than his fair share of his income.
4. Our Services are not long – We worship God, hear His Word, Give & Go Home: Going to some churches interferes with your leisure time.  Once the announcements, singing and long sermon is over for some it is half-time at the Bulls or Bears game that they planned to watch at home…Not so at Mars Hill!
5. We won’t beat you down – You’ll be empowered: Some churches are unsympathetic to what men experience.  Since many men attend church to mend their battered egos, they get upset when the minister adds insult to injury by attacking them in his sermon….NOT AT MARS HILL. We’ll encourage you through inspiring – life-giving preaching that’ll challenge & empower you to make a difference in life.

Man up & join us!

My late father, Dr. Clarence E. Stowers Sr., would always tell me, “Son, find a story and tell it well.”  I didn’t quite understand then, but I do today!  To steal one of the ancient slogans in advertising, “your brand is the truth about you, well told.”  This year many resolved to make lasting changes and become the best version of themselves.  I call it Version 2.0 – The me God wants me to be. 

In order to upgrade to Version 2.0, I encourage you to spend time pondering the following questions:

So Who Are You?

Like every organization, every person has a dozen good stories that reveal that person.  Stories move people. Stories excite people. Stories change people.  Your task is to write your story – the true story.  Ask for input from someone who knows you well; someone who can give you perspective.  Start there.  Get help, if necessary, but do it TODAY!

What Do You Do?

Most banks (Pre-Mortgage Crisis Meltdown) almost always ask this question of organizations that come to them for money.  It’s a simple question, but the answers often are not.  You must answer simply, too.  Otherwise you will confuse people.  If it sounds like you do many things, or too many seemingly unrelated things, people will assume you cannot do any of them well.  Here’s an assignment: Ask and answer “What do you do?”  Show it to four people whose opinion you value and ask them:

1. Is it clear?
2. Is it simple?

What Difference You Are Making?

Can you describe what difference you are making in three sentences or less?  Are you ready for this challenge?  Marketers often refer to the necessity of defining one’s “point of difference.”  You must not merely answer what makes you different, but how what you do makes a difference for others.  Ask and answer “What difference am I making?”  Show it to four people whose opinion you value and demand they be ruthlessly tough with their answers.

There are other questions, too; I doubt this list is exhaustive.  But I think I have covered the major ones.

Question: What other life-changing questions do you currently ask?

1. KEEPING PEOPLE PAST THEIR EXPIRATION DATE.   

I’m what you call an eternal optimist.  My first instinct is to see the best in people and work to bring it out in the open.  I’ve sent people to conferences, personally mentored them, invested time and resources into their development only to be disappointed. 

Dismissing a person is never easy, sometimes it’s inevitable.  From experience, I’ve learned that the first person you fire is ALWAYS the most difficult.  Before I replace someone, I ask myself: “Does the person really need to be replaced?” 

A sharper focus can be gained by asking:

1. Is the person’s ineffectiveness, poor leadership, or example blocking the progress of the ministry?
2. How much harm is being done?
3. What if the position goes vacant for a while (one of my favorite questions)?
4. What standard am I using to measure job effectiveness?  Sometimes we measure people against impossible standards.  We must distinguish between someone who cannot do a job from someone who can but lacks the necessary skills.

The right people don’t need to be managed—they just need to be pointed in the right direction.  Jim Collins said, “If the person came to tell you that he or she is leaving to pursue an exciting new opportunity, would you feel terribly disappointed or secretly relieved?”  If you’d be relieved, it’s time for them to go.

Have you ever had to fire someone?

How was the experience?

2. PUTTING PROJECTS BEFORE PEOPLE. 

 Ecclesiastes 7:18 says, “The man who fears God will avoid all extremes.”

This is one of those areas where we need to embrace the tension between relating with people and accomplishing the mission/getting the job done.  

Ask specifically: “Is there anything I can do for you?” 

You communicate how much you value someone by simply asking the question. Sometimes it’s nice to do something for another person without them asking or surprising them.  But if you’re not a good guesser and you don’t have psychic abilities, just ask.

Often, when I get home from work, I know there are two things I can say that will encourage my wife: 

1) I’d really like to hear about your day,

2) Is there anything I can do for you?

Have you made this mistake lately?

3. TRYING TO FIX THE PROBLEM RATHER THAN THE PROCESS.  

A problem is an obstacle which makes it difficult to achieve a desired goal, objective or purpose.  Furthermore, it refers to a situation, condition, or issue that is yet unresolved.  In a broad sense, a problem exists when an individual becomes aware of a significant difference between what actually is and what is desired.

Although pastoring has many positives, problems run parallel on twin tracks.  Trying to fix the problem rather than the process is like continuing to change diapers instead of potty-training your children. 

May I offer you a piece of unsolicited advice:

You can either continue to react to the problem, or you can fix the process. Ninety percent of the time it’s a systems-problem rather than a people-problem.

What’s your problem-solving method?

4. DELEGATING TASKS INSTEAD OF RESPONSIBILITY.  

In my humble opinion, the most overused and overrated buzzword in ministry today is “excellence.” As a pastor of a thriving urban church, I am committed to excellence in my life and the life of Mars Hill.

Because of my commitment to excellence, I can become obsessed about every detail.  I’ve noticed how I’ve made my expectations clear to our team and now they tend to obsess about every detail. However, it didn’t take long for the team to realize that their interpretation of excellence might not be the same as mine.

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 5. ASSUMING THINGS ARE EITHER BLACK OR WHITE. 

According to Wikipedia, ”a grey area is a term for a border in-between two or more things that is unclearly defined, a border that is hard to define or even impossible to define, or a definition where the distinction border tends to move.”

Wow, that’s a mouthful isn’t it!

I often say when I’m preaching, “let me give you the Stowers translation:”  A grey area is a subject or problem that people do not know how to deal with because there are no clear rules. 

Yea, I like that definition!!!

For those involved ministry, experience has taught us that grey areas exist!  Following rules is easier than the messiness of relationships.  Following rules is easier than discerning God’s will. The policies or guidelines we establish should actually remove barriers and allow more freedom within our organizations.

Moreover, innovative organizations don’t value the rules over relationships, they don’t value rules over people, and they don’t value rules over the mission.  As we seek to minister to God’s people, remember black and white are not the only colors in the box.

What do you do when you encounter a grey area? 

6. NOT FOLLOWING THE LEADING OF THE HOLY SPIRIT. 

The Spirit’s presence within us enables us to understand and interpret the Word.  Jesus told His disciples “when He, the Spirit of Truth, has come, He will guide you into all truth” (John 16:13). 

He reveals to our minds the whole counsel of God as it relates to worship, doctrine, and Christian living.  He is the ultimate guide, going before, leading the way, removing obstructions, opening the understanding, and making all things plain and clear. He leads in the way we should go in all spiritual things.  Without such a guide, we would be apt to fall into error. 

Sometimes when I’m facing a big decision, I try to acquire more information rather than seek God’s direction.  Here’s a fundamental principle to ponder: When we stop listening to God, He stops talking to us.  God stopped talking to Abraham for 13 years between the last verse of Genesis 16 and the first chapter of 17.  Sometimes, God requires us to take a step, in faith, before he reveals his plan.  Check out Joshua 3.

What happened in your life when you decided to yield to the Holy Spirit?