by Clarence E. Stowers | Nov 30, 2021 | Christian, Christianity, Decisions, Empowerment, Encouragement, Leadership, Motivation
Church leaders, are you sensing something but can't quite put your finger on it? Perhaps you're feeling it's becoming harder to lead. I want to talk about how we can change a culture. To do this, we need to understand it first.
We sometimes believe we have a problem when we don't. We have a word for that, and it's called being misdiagnosed, and it's something we must avoid in our efforts to reach people. To reach the post-Covid and post-Christian West, we must first understand it thoroughly.
As you know, the world is shifting at a rapid pace. In this post, I'd like to focus on cultural changes taking place right under our noses. In other words, let me explain the mindset of the people who attend our churches and why it's difficult leading them.
The People We Lead Prefer Individual Freedom and Happiness.
Lately, people are splitting into groups aligned with their self-interests. People are more interested in themselves and what they think of themselves. They don't care about what other people think of them anymore. These days, it's all about us.
People are more interested in themselves and what they think of themselves. They don't care about what other people think of them anymore. These days, it's all about us.
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The Bible established the standard for ethics, what people thought, how they behaved, and what they valued in the past. Experiences, wants, preferences, and emotions have taken their place.
For example, married people might say, "I feel like something has changed." And they might think that means they should get divorced. But sometimes, couples can work it out because their feelings change back again. That's why the divorce rate is five times what it was 50 years ago.
Furthermore, people will say, "I believe in God," but they won't attend church because it is old-fashioned and too traditional. Why? Because self has been elevated above God.
I have a friend who fights for Black Lives Matter. She's also sexually liberated and doesn't believe in God. She is like, "I am not going to listen to what you want me to do with my body, but I will tell you what you can do regarding Black Lives Matter.
The contradiction is confusing. Some people do not want to be judged on what they do. But on social media, everyone seems to judge other people. They're wannabe moralists.
As church leaders, we need to be able to push against this trend and make a difference.
Anything or Anyone That Restrict Freedom, Happiness, And Self-Expression Are Cancelled.
In the west, many people don't think religion is important. They believe that they can make their own religion. This may be because they don't like the way authority structures work. People want to do what they want to do and not follow anyone else, so many churches are having a hard time in today's world. That mindset doesn't adhere to the fact that Jesus is Lord.
When we say, "Jesus is Lord," it's about how we listen and obey what Jesus tells us. We know what we believe, but we must also follow his instructions.
Moreover, Christianity is not about winning. It is about obeying. We preach that you can be a winner in Christianity, but the truth is that it's about following something that goes beyond you. This can make your self-fulfillment challenging.
We preach that you can be a winner in Christianity, but the truth is that it's about following something that goes beyond you.
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What's Next?
Expand your thinking beyond the church and your building. Think Mission.
The church is not meant to be a sanctuary, but rather it's called the mission field. The goal should shift from building our faith within bricks and mortar walls; instead, let us strive for more than believing in something without seeing its results on earth--we need active participation that impacts lives around us!
The church is not meant to be a sanctuary, but rather it's called the mission field.
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If you are a church leader or pastor, this post should explain why leading in today's climate can be challenging. The people we lead prefer individual freedom and happiness instead of being told what they should do by an authority figure. This means that many churches are having trouble attracting members who want the gospel message of Jesus as Lord but not as Savior with all its restrictions on their behavior.
So, in short, people today don't want to be restricted by authority structures - including the church. They want to do what they want to do and not follow anyone else.
However, this doesn't mean that we should give up. We need to preach that Jesus is Lord and that our Faith is not about winning in life but following Him. We also need to be obedient to Him and not just do what we want. This will be a challenge in today's society, but it's one that we need to overcome.
by Clarence E. Stowers | Jun 26, 2019 | Decisions, Empowerment, Encouragement, Goals, Self-Leadership, Success
Welcome to the final installment of "Lessons You Wished You Learned Earlier In Life". If you haven't already, you can read Part 1 here and Part 2 here.
Someone once said, "everything that happens in life happens for a reason and lasts a season". I believe that to be true. Looking back, I've learned something from every stage in my life. In fact, life taught me much needed lessons I couldn't have learn elsewhere, while teaching me the power of reflection.
As I age, I'm reflecting more. "Reflection is the most important part of the learning process, and whatever is not reflected is usually not learned and retained", according to Rybo Chen. The only way for us to grow and improve is to take a good look at what’s working and what’s not for us.
So therefore, let's continue the countdown with the third lesson, most people you meet in life are selfish.
Reflection is the most important part of the learning process, and whatever is not reflected is usually not learned and retained. -Rybo Chen
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“Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.”
Why Is The World So Selfish?
Greed is a hard emotion to check. Did you catch that? If you did, then you know why most of the world is selfish.
Why is this world so selfish? Why do some rich and connected people cheat to get their kids into prestigious colleges and universities? Why, in the United States, are there are wider disparities of wealth between rich and poor than any time in history? I'll tell you why, people are inherently selfish.
As a whole, we have all become self-centered. Most of us hardly ever think of others anymore. It has become second nature to think of only ourselves. Unfortunately, most people think the world revolves around them and what makes them happy.
Yes, there are genuinely generous people, but they are very rare. Most of the people that you meet in your life will only care about themselves. and that's just the way that it is.
I can hear you saying, "wait, I know some people are good in the world" and I agree with you. Yes, some people are, but, as a whole, the majority of people that you're going to meet in life are mainly concerned with themselves. So be aware of that and understand the world is not all butterflies and sunshine.
I love to hear your feedback. Do you agree or disagree that most of the world is selfish?
Why is the world so selfish? Because greed is a hard emotion to check.
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“Self-absorption in all its forms kills empathy, let alone compassion.”
by Clarence E. Stowers | Jun 21, 2019 | Empowerment, Accountability, Decisions, Encouragement, Goals, Leadership, Motivation, Quotes, Self-Leadership, Success
Have you ever heard that "Hindsight is 20/20"?
"It's easy to know the right thing to do after something has happened, but it's hard to predict the future".
Like many, I've made many mistakes in life, but I've also learned from those mistakes. If only I would've listened, I could've avoided unnecessary setbacks. I would do some things differently if I could go back. Hindsight is 20/20.
If you're a teenager, in your early 20s, 30s, or 40s, or if you're just young at heart, I promise you will want to read this 3-part series, and can save yourself from the mistakes that most people make and regret for the rest of their lives. If you haven't read Part 1, you can read it here.
Let's continue the countdown with the sixth lesson, every action has consequences.
6. Every Action Has Consequences
As I age, I'm discovering how wise my father was. As a kid, he would remind me that every action/decision has intended and unintended consequences. Intended consequences are the outcomes we directly see as a result of our actions. But, unintended consequences are the outcomes we do not directly see. They are delayed consequences.
What's The Point?
Just because you don't immediately see the consequences (mostly unintended) of your actions doesn't mean they're not happening. You can't see wind either. You can, however, see the consequences of the wind.
There are intended and unintended consequences for all of our decisions. Sometimes they take years to realize. Let's continue with the countdown with the fifth lesson, time is a nonrenewable resource.
Just because you don't immediately see the consequences of your actions doesn't mean they're not happening.
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"Nobody ever did, or ever will, escape the consequences of his choices."
Alfred A. Montapert
5. Time is a Nonrenewable Resource
"A nonrenewable resource is a resource of economic value that cannot be readily replaced by natural means on a level equal to its consumption. Most fossil fuels, such as oil, natural gas and coal are considered nonrenewable resources", according to Investopedia.
Like the aforementioned, time is a nonrenewable resource. It cannot be readily replaced by natural means. What does that mean? You only have RIGHT NOW!
You only have right now. Whatever you're doing this second, you'll never get that second back. So, you want to make sure that you capitalize on all of the time that you do have and make sure you realize that being alive and healthy is a gift.
Moreover, you want to take advantage of that and live life to your truest potential. Why? You're never going to get the time back that you you know are experiencing right now.
Remember to do more of whatever makes you happy. Why? Eventually, we're all going to run out of time, and that's just the truth of the matter.
Let's conclude today's post with the countdown with the fourth lesson, everything is temporary.
Time is a nonrenewable resource. It cannot be readily replaced by natural means.
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"Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life."
Steve Jobs
4. Everything is Temporary
Everything is temporary and comes to an end. Wow, that's pretty dark, huh?
This lesson isn't meant to be dark, it's meant to wake you up! I don't want to sound fatalistic, but, everything comes to an end. I had lots of friends in high school and college. But, today, other than Facebook, I barely see or talk to them anymore.
I'm not mad at anyone and hopefully, no one's mad at me. People move on with their lives. They get married, move to different places, and it becomes difficult to stay in contact with them. So, be aware of the fact that things change and that everything is temporary.
Embrace people in the moment. Don't take the relationships you have today for granted. Love the people around you while enjoying their presence. Be happy that you have that time with them now!
Why? Because everything is temporary and all good things come to an end! Take advantage of now and live in the present moment.
I trust you found value in today's post and I'd love to hear your feedback on what lessons you've learned.
Everything is temporary and comes to an end.
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“The only permanent thing in this life is that everything is temporary.”
Author Unknown
by Clarence E. Stowers | Jun 19, 2019 | Empowerment, Accountability, Decisions, Encouragement, Excellence, Goals, Motivation, Quotes, Self-Leadership, Success, Vision
In 2005, Steve Jobs, founder of Apple Computer gave the Commencement Speech at Stanford University. Hidden in that speech is a powerful quote that resonates.
He said, “You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something - your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life”.
The idea behind this quote is that, as much as we try to plan our lives ahead in advance, there’s always something that’s completely unpredictable about life that teaches needed lessons. Unfortunately, people wait too long before learning those needed lessons. In today’s post, I’m sharing three of the nine lessons that people learn too late in life.
If you're a teenager, in your early 20s, 30s, or 40s, or if you're just young at heart, I promise you will want to read this 3-part series, and can save yourself from the mistakes that most people make and regret for the rest of their lives. Let's begin the countdown with the ninth lesson, people will criticize you.
“You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future..."
9. People Will Criticize Me, So What?
Regardless of who you are, someone will criticize you. The fear of criticism kills momentum and gets in the way of creating the life that you want. If you're afraid what other people say and think about you, you might as well stay inside and give up now.
Remember this: The more successful you become, the more haters you’ll attract. It’s like that, and that’s the way it is. So, you have to decide who do you want to be. Do you want to live and become your friend, your parents, or somebody else?
Or, do you want to live and create your own life? Remember, don't be afraid of criticism, do the things that you want to do, and live the life that you want to live. Let's continue with the countdown with the eighth lesson, you are responsible for your own happiness.
Remember this: The more successful you become, the more haters you’ll attract.
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8. I Am Responsible For Creating My Own Happiness
Guess what? Happiness is your choice. Unfortunately, a lot of people think that happiness is something that some people have and some don't. But, the truth is, happiness is YOUR choice.
Here are two important truths I’ve discovered about happiness:
- Happiness is not an easy choice.
- It takes a daily work to be happy.
What does progress have to do with happiness? Happiness comes from making progress. If you're making progress towards your goals, you're going to experience happiness. Unfortunately, many people don't learn this until too late in life. Additionally, they may complain about getting the short end of the stick and choose to remain unhappy.
If you want to experience happiness, you have to take consistent daily action towards choosing happiness. Let's conclude today's countdown with the seventh lesson, be yourself.
Happiness comes from making progress. If you're making progress towards your goals, you're going to experience happiness.
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“Don’t rely on someone else for your happiness and self-worth. Only you can be responsible for that.”
7. Be You - Do You
I once heard someone say, “why be a cheap copy when you can be a great original”?
Unfortunately, too many people wait too long to learn this valuable lesson. If you don’t have a firm grip on who you are, you’ll be tempted to borrow and live someone else’s life.
Furthermore, many people (parents, friends, associates, colleagues, etc.) have opinions on who you should be. In fact, they’re willing to offer their unsolicited advice. The sooner you're your own person, the sooner that you're happy with that person. Take Oscar Wilde's advice, “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken".
I trust you found value in today's post and I'd love to hear your feedback on what lessons you've learned.
”You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them."
by Clarence E. Stowers | Dec 12, 2018 | Empowerment, Decisions, Encouragement, Leadership, Self-Leadership, Success
Have you ever said things like this to yourself:
- “Does everything happen for reason”?
- “Every season has a reason”
- “Trust the process”
- “It just wasn’t meant to be”.
- “Even though I don’t understand everything now, everything happens for reason”.
Isn’t it amazing, but as we age in life, we have this insatiable desire to make sense out of the random things that happen in life?
We want our lives to be like the perfect jigsaw puzzle. A place where everything fits neatly and we can step back and understand how it all works together.
Everyone wants life to make sense.
Every time we experience an event, like a puzzle piece, we know exactly where it goes. Wouldn’t that be great? All of this is fine and dandy until we hit the big bumps in life and the only question we can ask is why? We want to know where do these pieces fit in life’s puzzle… random puzzle pieces like divorce, financial struggles, medical challenges, and friends stabbing you in the back.
We want to believe this wasn’t in the plan and say to ourselves, “I don’t know where this piece of the puzzle fits… It’s random. As a matter fact God, I don’t even like this piece, it’s the wrong color, and it doesn’t go or fit my puzzle.”
When people are going through a difficult season, let’s stop saying: “Well, that’s just how life goes. That’s life. Stuff happens”. It’s in all of us to want to help people make sense out of life’s random puzzle pieces. It’s in us… It’s human nature.
Randomness Draws Us To Jesus
For most of us, this is how we came to know Jesus. We looked at the picture on the box of the puzzle of how our life is supposed to be, and it looks nothing like the picture on the box. We found the edges color matched each piece, and when we received a random piece that didn’t look like a puzzle, it didn’t make sense. It eventually drew us to God.
That’s the beauty of following God. We don’t know with everything fits. We don’t know what he’s up to, so we exercise our faith. That’s what the Christmas story is all about. Got dipping down into humanity and making sense of all of the random puzzle pieces in the life of Mary and Joseph.
The Christmas Story Seems Random
The events of the Christmas story seem kind of random: a decree from Caesar, an engaged virgin, an angelic announcement, wise men giving gifts, and no room at the inn, This doesn’t sound like the story we’d write if we were God. Like Mary and Joseph, some of the circumstances we may be dealing with this year isn’t exactly what we’d write for our own stories either.
Something to Remember
“In the face of life’s seeming randomness, we can take comfort in the fact that God is active in the world. The Christmas story confirms that he is at work in the midst of darkness. As Christmas approaches, remind yourself that nothing just happens and life’s random puzzle pieces are a part of a bigger story”, according to Andy Stanley.
by Clarence Stowers | Jan 16, 2018 | Personal, Current Affairs, Decisions, Empowerment, Goals, Self-Leadership, Success
All of us want the security of having a safe environment not just for us, but for our families as well.
In today’s post, we’re going to be breaking down five ways that are going to ensure you provide a safer life for you and those around you.
1. Befriend Those You Want to Be Like
As Jim Rohn famously said, “You’re the average of the five people you spend most of your time with.” This is particularly true when you want to live a certain lifestyle. If you associate with the wrong types of people, they’ll rub off on you. Those people don’t have to be alcoholics and drug abusers. Let’s say you have a friend who arrives perpetually late to things. The more time you spend with that person, the higher the odds that you will start arriving late to things. If you want to be safe, surround yourself with like-minded people.
2. Avoid Alcohol
Alcohol can be dangerous for the user and their family. In fact, alcohol can often end up separating the family more often than bringing them together. As far as safety is concerned, alcohol can impair judgment and responsibility, increasing your chances of making a stupid decision that you’ll regret in the future. In the end, it’s best for you and your family if you just leave alcohol alone.
3. Invest in a Home Security System
This is definitely a significant step! A home security system ensures around-the-clock safety for you and your family. It allows you to know if any burglar is breaking into and entering your home, posing a threat to you and your loved ones. By installing this, an alarm monitoring company will be monitoring your house even when you’re not home. According to ADT, you can even monitor your security from a smartphone or tablet. Overall, your family and your home will have maximum protection from intruders.
4. Schedule Regular Check-Ups with Your Doctor
Regular check-ups to the doctor ensure that you are personally safe from any diseases or illnesses. Also, bring your family too if possible. This guarantees everyone is healthy, which results in a safer and happier household.
5. Invest in Yourself
Further education is always a good idea, especially when it comes to living a safe life. Find out further ways to provide safety and security for your family whether it be finances, relationships, health, happiness, etc.
By focusing on the above five steps, you can guarantee that you and your family live a pretty safe life.
